Wednesday, December 1, 2010

More than you want to know

This blog is normally about Summer, and my photography - however I have tried to move a lot of that over to my photography blog, but today I thought we could talk more about me, because I realized there are some things that I want to talk about but the stories would take WAY too long, so here it goes, my attempt at a self interview.

How old are you? I am 34 years old, well 34 1/2 now. I don't think I look like I am 34 but of course I would think that. I have no problem being that old, or that young depending on how old you are. I have accomplished a lot of good things in my life so I am fine being 34.

Where are you from? I was born in Wichita Falls on an Airforce base but mostly grew up in Oklahoma. My family moved to Georgia when I was in the 4th grade and we stayed there for 2 years, then moved back to Oklahoma.

How long have you been married? I was married about three years the first time. It was a nice marriage but we were young and I just grew into someone else. This time I have been married 10 years this past July and we are doing great, I see us together another 30 or 40 years at least!

Are you a worrier? Yes and No, mostly No, I don't sit around and worry but when anything happens, like the other night when Summer had a stomach ache and my husband immediately thought "gas" I immediately thought horrible things, emergency room visits, life threatening conditions, etc. Why? I had a panic attack in 2001 and it took me a long time to overcome the fear of dying. I would say I am 75% better but I still have issues, especially when it comes to someone's health. I constantly think something might be wrong with me, I can't take a pill of any kind without thinking the side effects are happening. It is manageable and I think it gets better as time passes. It was gas.

Do you want more children? If you haven't noticed I love Summer an insane amount and I would love one, or two, more children. We have been trying to get pregnant for the past two years, and after extensive testing and nothing being wrong, it just hasn't happened. I don't know how far I am willing to go to continue trying, so far three rounds of Clomid has proven unsuccessful, so for now I am doing nothing but just waiting to see what will happen. I do have a fertility statue that a friend let me borrow next to my bed to try this month. Would I do anything more drastic? Probably but I don't think Kris wants that and I respect that, so in reality probably not. I am happy with my one and if I only end up with her well I haven't forgot to count my blessings.

What about adoption? My brother was adopted and I love him as much as my real brother so while I totally think it works, I just don't think it would work for me. Not to mention how difficult and expensive it is, I would be worried about the unknown medical issues, mental issues, and loving my daughter more than the other baby. Of course I had hoped someone in my family, extended family, would have a child they could give me, but so far that hasn't happened. That is how we got my brother, he was my cousin.

Are you religious? I was brought up in a house where religion was not ever really mentioned so I grew up able to make my own decisions. I love learning and love religious people. I love going to church (but only recently, I hated going as a teenager when sleep was more important). If I had time, I would love to study religions. I only recently admitted to myself that I was an Atheist. It isn't a bad thing like I originally thought, just how I think. Maybe one day I will find something to make me change my mind, I keep looking.

What about your daughter? Summer is being raised a Christian because my father in law lives with us and he is very religious. He has taught her about God and Jesus and how to pray. I think it is cute and have no issues with it. It is actually easier, if someone dies "they go to heaven" is easier to explain.

Is your hair naturally curly? So many people ask me that - yes, but who knew! Before Summer was born I had perms. Perms for over 15 years. Once Summer was born I decided to go natural, that way we would look the same. I had my hair cut above my shoulders right after she was born and it keeps growing back wavy/curly. I never brush my hair ever, that would end in a frizzy mess. It doesn't stop me from wanting to do something with my hair, maybe go blonder, a tighter curl, a cut ... typical girl I guess.

What else do you want to know? Just ask - more than likely I will answer! I will leave you with a picture of something that means a lot to me. I took it yesterday, enjoy!